Category: Observations

Authenticity

Authenticity

Conflating authenticity with “I’ve gotta be me” may not be such a good idea, because being authentic doesn’t mean doing what we feel like doing when we feel like doing it. We’re authentic when we’re consistent, when we behave the same way whether there are cameras in the hallway or not, when our actions intersect […]

"They" Are Irrational

“They” Are Irrational

It’s “them.” They’re irritating, they speak out of turn, interrupt, throw temper tantrums, are prone to prejudice, impulsive and are incapable of seeing the big picture. The thing is… we’re “them” too.

Interpreting Negative Feedback

Interpreting Negative Feedback

I’ve been a mental health speaker for over 20 years and have published several books. Many people seem to like and approve of what I do, the way I present the material and love the products as accompaniments. There are those, however, who dislike my talks, express disdain for the products and abhor my presentation […]

Preparing To Prepare To Get Ready

Preparing To Prepare To Get Ready

Whatever your mission or goal, preparation is an essential ingredient to success, for sure. But if you find yourself entangled in a cycle of continuing to “prepare to prepare,” thinking that there’s one more thing that has to be in place before beginning, you’re just plain stuck – because there will be “one more thing” […]

Oppositional People – With or Without Defiance

Oppositional People – With or Without Defiance

When we encounter someone who frequently goes negative on us regarding a new rule, a change of some kind, a proposal or a certain situation, we often default to figuring out what we can do to make them happy – or at least appease them. So we start contemplating what kind of compromise we can […]

Comparisons That Work

Comparisons That Work

It’s easy for us to become disappointed with ourselves. And although we may not share this with others, whom among us haven’t, from time-to-time, compared ourselves to others — whether it is income, looks, house size, number of cars or whatever else we deem worthy of comparison. These are worthless, pointless comparisons because there’s always […]

Why Am I Wrong?

Why Am I Wrong?

If you find yourself sharing your thoughts and ideas about something important to you with someone you trust, and you’re also revealing how you intend to handle the situation, finish up with this question: Why am I wrong? It’s win-win for you. If your confidant thinks you’re wrong, they’ll tell you and hopefully set you […]

Awareness vs. Action

Awareness vs. Action

It’s not that we are unaware and don’t know about it, it’s that we don’t act on it. Awareness and action — two different things. We don’t act because we don’t know it’s a sure bet. But there’s no such thing as a sure bet. And the good things so often occur when we pull […]

Beating Ourselves Up

Beating Ourselves Up

We all do it, to some extent. Sometimes it’s just reflexive in response to something that’s gone wrong we feel responsible for and it passes; sometimes it’s protracted punishment because we conclude that leaving ourselves bruised and battered are our just deserts. Doing this not only hurts our head, knuckles and any other vulnerable body […]

It Costs You Nothing

It Costs You Nothing

When someone allows you to change lanes in a traffic jam, holds a door open for you when you’re juggling grocery bags or just merely notices you on the sidewalk, smiling and offering a nod or a wave costs you nothing and can turn out to be meaningful. Here’s how: A connection is made – […]