unsustainable relationship

Some Relationships Are Unsustainable

I ran into a friend last week that I had first met at a Church function. We exchanged pleasantries, caught up a bit on one another’s lives and then came to “let’s get together sometime.” I haven’t called since the encounter and neither has he. A few years back at my most recent high school […]

decisions

There Are Many Right Ways

Decision-making… daunting, to say the least for many, if not most of us. The thing is, we often have an answer or a solution, but we vacillate because we just might be missing something – and that something is the optimal choice for solving a problem, improving a relationship or launching a new initiative, for […]

Getting It Wrong Before Getting It Right

Getting It Wrong Before Getting It Right

Really, is there any other option for carving out a path to success?

Doing It Wrong, At First

Doing It Wrong, At First

Remember how learning to ride a bike? If you’re anything like me you learned by doing it wrong, falling off repeatedly, getting up, getting back on and doing it again… and again… and again. Actually, this approach works for lots of things. We learn best by doing something wrong the first time, then a little […]

When to Run From a Relationship

When to Run From a Relationship

If you’re in a relationship – personal, professional, social – where someone continually promises to change something about themselves or their lives and doesn’t, or is telling you that in order for them to change, you have to change, run away at your top speed – and by all means, promise yourself not to look […]

Fake Problems

Fake Problems

These are best described as either imagined or arbitrarily elevated to a position far loftier than they deserve. We all have problems before us that deserve high levels of concern and should be viewed through a lens of urgency. But instead of doing this, we opt rather to tackle the low hanging fruit, such as […]

The Day We Turn Pro

The Day We Turn Pro

The day or time that we really become professionals is when we take our work seriously but not personally. Being serious about our work is far easier than shedding the personal part of what comes with it. By personal, I mean the inevitable slings, arrows, criticisms, failures and miscalculations that come with the territory. When […]

You’re either with me or against me…

You’re either with me or against me…

… is not, and never will be a viable problem solving strategy, because problems can be nuanced and sometimes are not so straightforward. And such a strategy draws a line in the sand – creating an indolent way to deal with an issue we don’t care about enough to really understand. Most of all, an […]

Identification vs. Resolution

Identification vs. Resolution

Talk of New Year’s Resolutions has evolved to the point where it’s no more than fodder for all types of media to keep us cognizant of our flaws, make us eager to launch a campaign of improvements and assume responsibility for positive change. The morning shows like Today, are the best at taking the lead […]

I’ll Get to It Someday

I’ll Get to It Someday

Someday. That’s pretty open-ended when it comes to getting started on something or setting goals that people claim they want to reach. Someday, why not now? This is the question I usually ask of clients who have all sorts of explanations and rationalizations for why they can’t act now, but can’t tell me when the […]